One of my best ideas

So, I'm just sitting here, soaking up the Sunday television, watching a little 8th & Ocean (Best. Model-base reality television show. Evar. Plus, a little nipple slip here and there never hurts). But that is neither here nor there. What is here, and not there, is that I don't think I like working for the man anymore. So, I'm thinking about starting my own enterprise. I'm not sure what that enterprise will be. One idea I had was Bartari.

Bartari was something I came up with in DC, because it combines two of my favorite things: drinking and video games (Bar + Atari = Bartari). The idea is simple, take a bar, put in 10-20 retro style video games, and enjoy. In order to get people in the door, you could hold high score competitions for Pac-Man, Joust, and Galaga. I'd hang out there. Throw in a little pong and some real-life air-hockey and you have yourself an awesome bar. And guess what's on the TV? Not sports. No. Something much, much nerdier: Sci-fi movies, G4-TV, and trivia. I'm saying, it's a goldmine. But, alas, I'm not much of a restaurateur. And, for opening night, we could get this kid to promote the event. So, I've been thinking about other ideas. But, I'll save those for another post. For now. Ponder the genius that is Bartari. Feel free to open your own local franchise. I'll organize delivery of video games, and commemorative napkins, the rest is up to you.

Or, if opening a bar is too much work for you, you can invent your own Ben & Jerry's flavor. I did. Now, I'm just waiting for the telephone call in which I'm offered a job as head Ice-cream flavor creator for BJs. They are picking five though, so that leaves enough room for my three readers to invent some tasty treats as well. Then we can take over Ben & Jerry's and then the world!

Comments

[parker]

First of all...that kid was *not* me. I know, I know - many of you probably assumed that Austin got ahold of some archive footage of my earlier christmases....had that been an original nintendo - I mighta been a bit more worried that the video was authentic, given my own psychotic reactions at christmas time back in the day.
Also. The bar idea. Oh my freakin god, Austin. Amazing idea. Although, you'd have to do something about the logo - it couldn't be the atari logo cause they'd get you for copyright infringement (see, I'm always lookin out for ya, man)...perhaps you could flip the logo upside down, put a horizontal line over the three lines, and have a silouhette with a pint glass in hand or something sitting at the "table"...just an idea....anyway....I added my flavor to B&J's, but I don't think they're gonna honor it - it's called "Pregnant Lady's Delight" cause it's got pineapple, eggnog, peanut butter, marshmallow, gummie bears, peppermints, and pretzels as ingredients....buwahahahahahahaha

[Austin]

Parker,
Three thoughts:
1) Are you sure that isn't you? Because when your mom gave it to me, she said that you'd say it wasn't you. Now I don't know who to believe.

2) You fell victim to one of the classic blunders. The first of which is never to get involved in a land war in Asia, but the second, only slightly lesser know is: Never give away your secret Ben & Jerry's flavor when there's a competition going on! Now your secret is mine. All I have to do is tweak a few minor details to make ours seem different enough for me to steal all the glory! My master plan is almost complete!

2.b) Your recipe does remind me of the new candy bar I tried the other day. It's called a Take 5, and they have those stupid commercials on TV: The one with the two guys getting the candy bar out of the claw machine at the bowling alley and then jumping around and the screen freezes and says: "Two idots? Or the world's greatest candy bar." Well, that was enough to hook me, so I bought one. It was tasty. It has chocolate, peanut butter, pretzels, peanuts, caramel, and some other stuff that combines the best elements of every candy bar into one delicious treat. Much like your flavor. I'd eat it. Although, I'd probably name it, "Pickles & Ice Cream," just because I want to!

3) I'll work on a new logo.

[Austin]

I almost forgot... Bartari must be located at 2600 some street. It would be wrong to have it be located anywhere else. Bartari - 2600 Anystreet, Anytown USA 00001

[Nate]

I see a possible problem with this bar... one that we encountered with every party we ever threw at college. How will you convince a woman into a) actually coming to this bar, and b) staying once they have been dragged in?

[Austin]

Nate, I see your point, but you have made an ass out of both u and me. You assume that ladies are actually encouraged to frequent this location. But they are not. They are paid to frequent this location. The women are the bartenders, waitresses, hostesses, you name it. It's like a gentlemen's club minus the strippers, and with video games.

[Nate]

Brilliant.

[parker]

maybe you could even offer incentives for the ladies to know video game trivia, game cheats, and tips for folks playing the old school games. That way they'd be all the more desirable to the clientelle - I mean, come on, hot women who dig video games....I know they don't exist in real life, but that's the whole point of this place right?

[Christina]

I like the idea. The bargoers could even get happy ending hand massages in a back room.

I was trying to think of two of my favorite things I would combine...

I'd name my bar "Sips"- you can have sex and eat chips. Sips.

[Austin]

Just don't get crumbs in the bed or that's the last time you'll be enjoying both of those things are the same time.

[christina]

hi my name is christina whats up?